Miley spent a significant portion of her show scantily clad in extremely compromising positions that had us thinking pretty much about only one thing: how it seemed just so similar to porn.
But honestly, any sport would look hot if it was photographed the way beach volleyball is, right? On the grass, between buildings, people are getting down and dirty.
It's not even the ridiculous looking seizure helmet.
Everyone's meeting people and trying to hook up with someone.
But rest assured, your family is in no danger of seeing anything this racy just by watching the Olympics.
It turned into a whirlpool orgy.